Last trade day, we saved Mike Conley from the perils of the Memphis Grizzlies. By random, he was traded to the Bulls, who immediately lost him to the Nets on that same Trade Sunday. This week, we’re saving that big guy who can’t hit a free throw to save his life.
The Knicks are 9-35 coming into this trade day (which I’m moving to MLK day since it’s a pretty important day in the NBA and cuz the schedule is JUICY), so we need to bounce Jordan to a competitive team. The Grizz can’t be in the randomization since they blow and the Bulls can’t either since they traded for Conley.
The winner is…
OK, now I know the Spurs seems fun, but the Spurs just finished an 8 game losing streak and have Aldridge… and that’s about it. They lost DeRozan a long time ago and even Rudy Gay… sooo have fun with Jordan and Aldridge I guess?
Here’s the previous Trade results from the first 3 months of the season!
Trade Week 1
Trade Week 2
Trade Week 3
Trade Week 4
Trade Week 5
Trade Week 6
OK, now let’s get into MLK Trade Day!
Thunder:105 (24-22)
Knicks:113 (10-35)
Wut. The Knicks just lost their only guy with an 80 overall and lose to Paul George & De’Aaron Fox. What?! Damyean Dotson was the Knicks leading scorer! Ok, ok I’m not giving Fox to NY, since I declared NY dead and gave Jordan away. But I will do everything in my power to burn OKC down to the ground
Trade: The Thunder’s franchise to hell
Bulls: 83 (18-29)
Cavaliers: 82 (18-30)
Trade: Jordan Clarkson to CHI for Antonio Blakeney
CHI STARTING 5: Clarkson, Zach Lavine, Otto Porter, Lauri Markkanen, Wendell Carter Jr.
CLE STARTING 5: Brandon Knight, JR Smith, Cedi Osman K-Love, Tristan Thompson
Mavericks: 110 (19-27)
Bucks: 166 (26-20)
JACKPOT! BUCKS WIN, AND GET DONCIC. OHHH BABY! For some reason, Porzingis was a higher rating than Doncic to begin the season so he was the untouchable. Mavs had CP3, Porzingis, and Luka and SUCKED, so I dismembered the would-be dream team. And now, Milwaukee has a SICK lineup with Middleton leading the season in the 6th Man of the Year race. Also, Bledsoe has been one of the best point guards… I’M IN! NOTE: I played with the Bucks but didn’t actually put up 166. The stats and scores are adjusted to a regular 48 minute game… so they put up 166 and Giannis had 43 PTS, 14 REB, 12 AST, 3 STL, 5 BLK… holy shit!!!
TRADE: Luka Doncic to MIL for Tony Snell
DAL STARTING 5: JJ Barea (CP3 injured), Tim Hardaway Jr., Snell, Kristaps, Salah Mejri… oof
MIL STARTING 5: Bledsoe, Brogdon (RIP), Luka, Giannis, Brook Lopez
Pistons: 105 (23-23)
Wizards: 147 (29-17)
Damn… a lot of points this week. Anyways, Detroit has been one of the quieter, but still decent, teams so far this season. Washington has been fun to play with on 2K and they just got better! Blake Griffin is the untouchable so he can’t be traded. So it’s down to Andre Drummond and Reggie Jackson. Drummond his a higher overall, but the Wizards have already traded for two centers and have Steven Adams starting. Jackson is putting up 22.3 PPG this season and WAS needs a backup PG… Jackson it is! Oh, Washington has also won 7 straight and are 2nd in the conference.
TRADE: Reggie Jackson to WAS for Tomas Satoransky
DET: Satoransky, Luke “White privilege” Kennard, Glen Robinson III, Griffon, Drummond
WAS: Wall, Beal, Trevor Ariza, Bobby Portis, Adams
Magic: 98 (26-21)
Hawks: 101 (21-25)
Oddly enough, the Hawks are 3-0 on Trade days?? I mean, they’ve acquired Colin Sexton and Josh Richardson in the first two, so are they really winners? Meanwhile, the Magic have imploded. They had DeRozan, Dennis Smith Jr., Vucevic, Gordon and Terrence Ross at one point. They lost DeRozan and now lost Gordon.
TRADE: Aaron Gordon to ATL for Omari Spellman
ORL STARTING 5: Smith Jr., Evan Fournier (Ross injured), Jonathan Isaac, Spellman, Vucevic
ATL STARTING 5: Trae Young, Kent Bazemore, Richardson, Gordon, John Collins… not terrible?
Kings: 109 (10-37)
Nets: 120 (25-23)
Ok, the Kings are the next team to be forced into giving up their untouchable Buddy Hield. Poor guy needs to be on a winning team!
TRADE: Marvin Bagley III to BKN for Jared Dudley
SAC STARTING 5: Yogi Ferrell, Buddy Hield, Harrison Barnes, Nemanja Bjelica, Harry Giles (how good would this team be in college!?)
BKN Starting 5: D-LO, J-Butts, Joe Harris, Bagley III, Jarrett Allen
Heat: 111 (19-26)
Celtics: 101 (31-16)
Ouch. Celtics are still the #1 seed in the East but they already lost Jayson Tatum and now they just lost Gordon Hayward. They still have Kyrie who is 3rd in the league in scoring (28.9) but they’re in some trouble now.
TRADE: Gordon Hayward to MIA for Derrick Jones Jr.
MIA STARTING 5: Goran Dragic, Dion Waiters, Hayward, James Johnson, Hassan Whiteside
BOS STARTING 5: Kyrie, Jaylen Brown, Marcus Smart, Marcus Morris, Al Horford
Rockets: 111 (25-21)
76ers: 115 (29-19)
My goal with this game was to win with the Rockets and pick up Jayson Tatum to go alongside Russ and Harden. But I, apparently, am not very good at this game because I lost. Just like I lost with the Celtics… whoops. Philly is STACKED. They lost Jimmy Butler pretty early on, but since have picked up Tatum, Andrew Wiggins and now… Russell Westbrook Junior the Third.
TRADE: Russ Westrbook to PHI for TJ McConnell
HOU STARTING 5: McConnell, Harden, Eric Gordon, Kenneth Faried, Clint Capela
PHI STARTING 5: Ben Simmons, Russ, Tatum, Tobias Harris, Joel Embiid
Trail Blazers: 101 (23-25)
Jazz: 79 (28-20)
There’s a big win for Ace! I thought about playing with Utah to pick up McCollum to the Jazz, but without Donovan Mitchell, they’re not that fun. So I played with the Blazers and slaughtered Utah with McCollum (29 PTS) instead.
TRADE: Derrick Favors to POR for Skal Labissiere
POR STARTING 5: Lillard, McCollum, Jake Layman, Favors, Enes Kanter
UTA STARTING 5: Ricky Rubio, Rodney McGruder, Jae Crowder (Joe Ingles INJ), Myers Leonard, Rudy Gobert
Warriors: 110 (40-7)
Lakers: 98 (27-21)
God damnit. Another big L taken by me. I’m trying my hardest to dismember the Warriors superduperteam but I can’t do it captain. I JUST CAN’T DO IT! I put up 39 PTS, 12 REB, 2 AST, 3 STL, 3 BLK with LeBron and still blew it. We were tied with, like, a minute to go and they crushed me down the stretch. It’s the second time the Warriors have cucked me and thwarted an attempt to get KD to the fighting Lebrons. Whatever. GSW is good, sue me. That’s also 8 wins in a row for GSW.
TRADE: Javale McGee to GSW for Damian Jones
GSW STARTING 5: Curry, Thompson, Durant, Kuzma, Cousins
LAL STARTING 5: Lonzo Ball, D-Wade, LeBron, Jordan Bell, Tyson Chandler.
AceSite 